The Dark Night

The light shines bright in the vast darkness,

Vivid, white, pure, delicate, and soft. 

The voice within speaks loud, and certain,

The message is clear, the words are distinct. 

The illumed, liquid mirror was dazzling,

Glistening and sparkling light danced across it. 

The breeze was cool and refreshing,

Bringing with it, the song of the night wind. 

The insects, frogs, and creatures of the dark,

Their voices rise and hail you to hark.

The symphony of night is in full movement,

The music made is the sound of heaven. 

The ambience of it is that of peace,

The feeling invoked is one of solitude. 

A scene so tranquil, a melody so grand,

As I alone, in awe now stand.

The First, The Last

The first to fall in,

The last to fall out,

The first to leap,

The last to land,

The first to dive,

The first to drown. 

The first to hope,

The firs to despair,

The first to dream,

The last to wake up.  

The Walls

The walls rose high as the eye could see,

No doors, no windows.

 

Though all was not darkness, for the walls were not opaque,

A clear, pale shade of green. 

 

The outer world could clearly be seen,

Though in the monochrome color of sickness. 

 

The small space should have felt confining,

Unknowingly, but used to it, the beast had become. 

 

It did not feel trapped, for it could see the outside,

Though enjoy it, the beast could not. 

 

Yet, it was safe, protected by these walls,

No pain, no hurt, no disappointment. 

 

Though, life had become void of meaning and joy,

There could be no torment nor sorrow. 

 

In the absence of warmth and light,

An icy darkness had taken over. 

 

A small price to pay for safety and security,

For one avoids the pain that others recklessly pursue. 

 

Yet, deep within, something stirs,

A deep rooted longing fills the beast. 

 

The icy walls began to melt and light shines through,

In the presence of light, the beast suddenly felt cold. 

 

For the first time in as long as he could remember,

It felt, scared, vulnerable, and, alone. 

 

The beast was not sure what happened,

Nevertheless, he was rapidly becoming an alien in his own world.

The Other Side

I stare into those piercing blue eyes, belonging to a person I once knew.

Together we used to be happy and carefree, without a thought of the world.

Laughter filled our soul and our voice carried a melody.

Together we made friends and enjoyed our family.

We would watch the storms together and admire the skies.

Leafing we would go in the Autumn time of the year.

Festive we made the Winter seasons and all of its days.

At night we lay down together and enjoyed good books.

The years have passed and now I wonder as I stare.

Things that brought a joyous smile now bring indifference.

Things that brought us closer now push us apart.

The zest and zeal we used to have now gone.

The spark and flame of life itself now are cooling embers.

That which was, now is gone, and no more light, even at dawn.

The person I thought I knew is now someone new.

Where are the love, light, life, and laughter?

Into those eyes I stare and shudder,

Who is looking back me from the other side of the mirror?

CODIFICATION OF DISCRIMINATION — North Carolina Amendment One — Senate Bill 514 [Defense of Marriage (DOMA)]

Every time the calendar turns toward an election, be it local, state, or federal, the mudslinging starts. I think Merry Maids must stay very busy during these times. It always turns out to be a battle of and a choice between the lesser of two evils (for in my experience, politics corrupts even the purest of souls). I have seen it corrupt ministers and “good ole boys.” At least on a local level anyway.

I have my opinions and I do vote, but, for the most part, I try to avoid discussing matters of religion and politics. It almost always turns into a heated debate and argument as most people cannot agree to disagree and even then, they disagree with the person and not the person’s point of view or ideology, as is the respectable way to do so and still maintain a healthy relationship with said person. When you disagree with a person, you subconsciously come to no longer trust that person or develop resistance against that person. When you disagree with a person’s belief, you maintain a healthy relationship while only disagreeing with said point of view.

However, with this particular political battle, I feel the need to exercise my right and say something. I know that not everyone will agree. More than likely, most people will disagree with what I have to say. Nevertheless, I respect everyone’s right to agree or disagree (peacefully) and I respect everyone’s right to believe as they will (also, peacefully). That is, after all, what The United States of America represents – the right to free-will and free-thought, guaranteed by, “god,” and “state,” within reason, of course.

With the recent battle of politics, many things have come to disturb me. “We the People of the United States, in Order to form a more perfect Union, establish Justice, insure domestic Tranquility, provide for the common defence [sic], promote the general Welfare, and secure the Blessings of Liberty to ourselves and our Posterity, do ordain and establish this Constitution for the United States of America.” To establish said union, a Constitution was ratified on September 25, 1789 and adopted on December 15, 1791: The First Amendment of the Bill of Rights. Let me quote, “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.” [emphasis added]. We left and broke away from England because we were tired of being told what to believe and how to go about it. Here we are, almost two-hundred fifty years later, doing the very thing we abhorred England for doing. Hypocritical, don’t you think?

I do understand that many have taken to interpret that The Constitution of the United States says that we are a Christian nation. I will grant, that in the beginning, there were many Christians who founded the nation. Most of those Christians, however, were Unitarian &/or Universalists in their beliefs. The words, “god,” “Jesus,” or any reference to the Holy Bible are not found in The Constitution of the United States. It is of my opinion that this was done to avoid the hypocrisy that is taking place today. As with the First Amendment of the Bill of Rights, “Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof. . .” We cannot uphold this right or escape hypocrisy if we are attempting to force the religious views of any one faith or sect upon the masses.

Also, how can the government, or we as the people, fulfill the preamble to The Constitution of the United States: form a more perfect union, insure domestic tranquility, establish justice, etc., if we are too busy worried about what others are doing? I understand that we have to have a common code of conduct for there to be civil order. However, the government should have no place to police morals. Common code of conduct should follow our founding father’s idea of government, less interference in the personal lives of the people. As long as what I do does not interfere with your right to do as you please (whether you like what I do or not) and as long as what I do causes no physical harm to you or your well-being, then it is not the government’s place nor your place to tell me that what I do is wrong. Morals should be taught at home and in church, not pushed or policed by the government.

Now, I know what many Christians are thinking at this point. Growing up, I was raised first in a Southern Baptist Church, then Pentecostal Holiness, before finally my parents (divorced) settled into a Methodist Church. My first year of college was in a Christian College. I am very familiar with the Holy Bible. Let me note, however, that I am not a Christian. I have, since, also studied many other religions and their beliefs. It is my finding that many, if not most, of the followers of religions too often focus on a single tree of the forest instead of seeing it all for what it is.

I digress. Most Christians think that by allowing gay marriage or other domestic relationships (yes, some of them are heterosexual in nature as well), will somehow call down the wrath of God upon them and the world. Many scriptures are quoted stating this: Leviticus 18:22, Romans 1:24-27, Revelation 9:20-21, and many others. Many non-Christians will then argue the verses about shell-fish and wearing clothes woven of two fabrics and what god has joined let no man separate, etc. Christians will then argue about that being the Old Law (Old Testament). Here, I like to propose an often over looked scripture from the Holy Bible of the Christian faith: “For verily I say unto you, Till heaven and earth pass, one jot or one tittle shall in no wise pass from the law, till all be fulfilled.” That was quoted from the King James Version of the Holy Bible, Matthew 5:18. I am not dispelling the Bible – that is not my argument here. I believe everyone has the right, granted by, “god,” and The Constitution of the United States, to believe as they so wish. My argument here is this, if you are going to enforce your beliefs on others about gay marriage and children out of wedlock and abortion why not enforce them amongst yourself about divorce/adultery, judging others, and plucking the log out of thy own eye (Matthew 7:3). Jesus also said he would rather you be hot or cold and not lukewarm [sinner or saint (not straddling the fence)], Revelation 3:16.

It is my understanding of the Bible and the teachings of Jesus that all you have to do as a Christian is love the sinner and offer him (the sinner) the path of salvation. It is up to us as non-Christians as to whether or not we accept it. If we don’t, your conscience should be clear. You offered, if we don’t accept and we die and burn as hell (as we are so often told) then it was our choice and not by any neglect, wrong doing, or fault of yours as a Christian. Jesus never once forced any of his beliefs on anyone. He just loved them and taught them, if they followed, great, if not, he went on about his life. He continued to allow mankind to have the choice his father gave at the creation of the world: free will.

It is my belief that religion, in this case, Christianity, is being used to manipulate the people for the personal gain and fulfillment of government leaders to one-up the other. Religion is a very personal matter and the government, religious extremists, and overzealous evangelicals (especially those that love to hold cardboard signs) have taken the serenity and beauty out of something as personal as religion and have used it to divide the nation (for their own gain, publicity, &/or notability). It has been done to many others, not just homosexuals, but also to atheists, other religious minority groups, and even a woman’s right to choose about her reproductive rights.

Shortly after Tuesday, September 11, 2001, a slogan was seen across many bumpers and back windshields and billboards: United We Stand. We are far from being united. If we continue to live divided, we will fall. You don’t have to agree with gay marriage. My parents for the longest time didn’t, and still to this day, don’t agree with the idea that I am gay. However, they have learned to accept and they love me still. You don’t have to agree with the fact that John Doe is an atheist, or that Jane Doe is having an abortion, or that Adam is marrying Steve, or Sally is sleeping with Susie, but, let your god be our judge as he so commanded (Matthew 7:1-5). You offer us his salvation and many of us decline, like Jesus, let us go in peace and let him seal our fate on the Day of Judgment. You never know, you may actually find more followers of your faith and may gain your faith more respect by doing so.

Amendment One (Senate Bill 514), proposed before the General Assembly of the State of North Carolina in 2011, is up for vote in a few weeks, May 8, 2012. Most people have been led to believe that this bill is to ban gay marriage. While it will, and make it even harder to be overturned in the future (if passed). There is already legislation in place banning the legal recognition of gay marriages and other domestic partnerships. This bill, is so open ended, that courts, lawmakers, and judges can make it say almost whatever they so will. Here is the URL for you to read for yourselves: http://www.ncleg.net/Sessions/2011/Bills/Senate/PDF/S514v3.pdf

This amendment to the Constitution of the State of North Carolina will cause heart ache for many. All because people are so blinded by dogma and will not open their minds to think for themselves. North Carolina is not the only state with such bills before the voting public. I urge and implore you to at least read and study these bills before you vote. I understand and accept your right to vote according to your beliefs, but, please vote out of educated knowledge and not just because you were told or asked to vote in any one manner, or because it is what you were always taught and it is how things have always been. Remember, the people once thought the world was flat and those who thought otherwise were burned or hanged or both.

To those of us who are passionately against Amendment One and other Codifications of Discriminations, please remember that whatever happens in a few weeks, no constitution can change what is in your heart and soul. If Amendment One passes, it can still be overturned with a little hard work and determination. Times are changing, slower than we would like, but, changing nonetheless. Rise up! Live and let live.

Her Life

She is the little baby crying in the crib-

Cooing and smiling at silly faces.

She plays with dolls and serves them tea-

Chitter and chatter in make believe.

Dressed so pretty with books in hand-

Off to school to learn.

Wishes there are and dreams also-

A lady of innocence and purity.

Brushing her hair in the mirror-

Smiling and talking nonstop.

Beautiful face and revealing eyes-

Into his they stare.

Down the aisle she marches-

In a gown of white and crown of blooms.

Her own baby now cries from nearby-

Holding it as close as her dolls at tea.

In her babe’s eyes she sees the mirror-

Of her own dreams and hopes, some shattered some yet found.

Against and in her heart she holds her little one-

For baby, too, will experience the trials of life.

She watches her babe grown, just as she did-

And as she continues to still do.

Love, joy, and the smell of good food abound-

For her laughter and love knows no bound.

Through joys and sorrows, smiles and tears-

A portrait is made across the years.

A face once smooth now wrinkled in time-

Hair once full and dark now coarse and gray.

The smile no less warm and the voice sweeter still-

And eyes filled with stories and arms full of love.

A spirit of innocence tempered with wisdom-

A heart of purity bruised by sorrow.

Her soul a masterpiece like none other-

Her life as Mother.

The Season of Rebirth

 

The season of spring has come-the season of rebirth. Many pagan religions have just recently celebrated Ostara, or the Vernal Equinox. It is a holiday marking the time of equal darkness and light and the strengthening and growing of the Sun. The days following have more hours of daylight than darkness. It is also the season when the sleeping Mother Earth awakens into life. We can apply this lesson to our lives. Just as spring is a time of renewal for the Earth, so to, can it be a time of renewal for us. It is a time when we can learn to do away with the old things in our lives and begin new things in our lives, such as the breaking of bad habits, the instilling of new habits or even the discarding of doctrines and beliefs that hold us back and the instilling of new ideas that challenge us and help us to grow. Spring is my second favorite season of the year. One of the many things about spring that I enjoy is the thunderstorms that come with it. The storms bring water to the land and help the plants grow and bloom. The lightning gives us the beneficial element of nitrogen that is important for life to thrive. One may view the symbolism that the storms of spring wash the lands and us of the old and allow the new to grow. Spring is a powerful and moving time of the year.

Do Not Fret

Upon yesterday the sun has set,

Upon tomorrow it hasn’t risen yet,

Upon today it shines, for the yester & the morrow, do not fret!

Late Winter Sunrise

These photographs were taken March 2010 in McDowell County, West Virginia. That is where I born and grew up. It is a very economically depressed area but a very beautiful place. My father and I would ride ATVs and wander around the mountains of the Coal Fields. Also, my best friend Sara, whom I have been friends with since birth, would hike all around the mountains.

I will admit, that I am an amateur at taking photographs (and this is also my first blog), however, for the year of 2010, I wanted to record the changing of the seasons in southern West Virginia. That year, I took hundreds of photos noting the changes in the landscape as the Wheel of Time come full circle. It was beautiful and I was able to do a lot of meditation and journaling that year.

Nature has a way of speaking to us if we take the time to look and listen. I am a person who loves symbolism and my religious views are mostly spiritual and pagan. This little project that I undertook gave me a lot of insight into my life then and still does two years later. Like this sunrise, for example.

The past year (2011) was a very difficult one for me. I had a lot medical problems and had to undergo ten surgeries. That situation not only affected me physically, but mentally, emotionally, and spiritually as well. Most of us go through what is often called, “The Dark Night of the Soul.” Some of us have more than one in our lives. Last year was one of those for me. The Dark Night of the Soul can be compared to the season of Winter. We often feel that life is pointless and that our spirits feel cold and barren, like the landscape of Winter. However, during Winter, the land rests and through the death and decay of fallen leaves, dead plants, and branches fallen from winter storms, the land is nourished. The land is then watered with the melting snows and Spring rains. From the death of the land the land is reborn anew.

During the Dark Night of the Soul, we can let go of things of the past. We learn to do away with thoughts and beliefs that no longer serve us and challenge ourselves to become stronger and wiser. It is a spiritual, off with the old and on with the new, so to speak.

While looking at the pictures of the sunrise I took that very cold March morning with my father from the snow covered mountain tops, I realized a few things about my life. My surgeries were a healing for my body and my soul and that just as Spring follows Winter and the sunrise follows the darkest night, a new life will begin with the healing of my wounds. Not only in the physical sense of body healing, but my soul and spirit as well. It is always darkest just before the dawn, in the physical world as well as in the spiritual realms as well. Just remember to live each day as if it were your last, for none of us know when we will see our last sunrise.